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CNN News Story: Sisters try to fuck over neighbors with cookies!


JTello
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Here's an unbelieveable story I found over at CNN.com that I thought I'd share with you guys,....

 

Click Here for the Real cnn.com news story

 

Now here is a bit of a creative twist I personally put on the article. I hope you enjoy! :P

 

 

Sisters try to fuck over neighbors with cookies!

 

DURANGO, Colorado (AP) -- Two teenage bimbos who jacked over their neighbors by giving out homemade cookies late one night were ordered to pay nearly $900 in medical bills for a poor defenseless middle aged woman who says she was so startled that she "had to go to the fucking hospital."

 

Heartless Judge Doug Walker declined Thursday to award punitive damages to the accosted woman, saying he did not believe the two jailbait hussies acted maliciously.

 

Taylor Ostergaard, 17, and Lindsey Jo Zellitti, 18, baked the chocolate chip and sugar cookies (and probably laced them with LSD and arsenic) one night last July.

 

They made packages with a half-dozen doobies each and added large red or pink construction-paper hearts that carried the message, "Have a great night, dooshbags ."

 

The notes were signed with their first initials: "Love, The T and A Club."

Then they set off to make their crack deliveries.

 

Wanita Renea (not-so) Young, 49, said she was at her rural trailer trash home south of Durango around 10:30 p.m. when she said saw "shadowy figures" outside the house banging repeatedly on her door.

 

She yelled, "Who's there?" but no one answered, and the figures ran away.

Frightened like a 5 year old kid at a boogieman convention, she spent the night at her sister's trailer trash home, then went to the hospital the next morning because she was still shaking and had diarrhea.

 

The teenagers' families offered to pay Young's medical bills and feed her sweet grapes by hand, but she declined and sued, saying their apologies were not sincere and were not offered in person, and that she doesn?t like grapes because the make her tummy feel all poopy.

 

The two wanna-be girl scout crack whores declined comment after the ruling. Taylor's mother said the girl "cried and cried. And Cried. And cried. And cried. And,?."

 

"She felt she was being punished for doing something nice," Jill Ostergaard said. ?This must be what it?s like to give $50 handjobs to dirty old men.?

 

Young said the teenage twits showed "very poor judgment, and the cookies were a little over cooked for my taste."

 

"The victory wasn't sweet, but the cookies were! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Young said. "But seriously, I'm not gloating about it. I just hope the girls learned a lesson. You don?t walk on my nice green lawn, or I?ll kick youz bitchez asses."

 

The teens said they did not answer when the woman called out because they wanted the treats to be a surprise. ?Like the sort of surprise dad got when he came across our nastyteensistersgetdirtytogether.com website. Oh we got spanked real hard for that surprise.?

 

 

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I was confused for a while, at your supposed quoted excerpt and then the CNN article which made little sense. I guess it was the order I read them. If you linked the CNN article first, and then presented the "modifications", it would've been alot more coherent. :)

 

Regardless, once I figured it out, your additions were too funny! :lmfao

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I was confused for a while, at your supposed quoted excerpt and then the CNN article which made little sense. I guess it was the order I read them. If you linked the CNN article first, and then presented the "modifications", it would've been alot more coherent.

 

I guess I'm slower. I was confused until your post. :bh

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