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The place to list some Simpsons lines


Rob B

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What the hell why not?

 

I figured it might be fun to post some of your favorite Simpson’s lines.

 

Inspiration? My New sig line and then I saw Angry The Clowns and poof here is the thread.

 

 

I will go first..........

 

 

 

"I thought they said that monster island was just name"

"It is it's actually a peninsula"

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Timely subject' date=' as I just typed the following in a PM to Joel in reference to waiting for the X360 to arrive at his house:

 

Homer: "And now we play...the waiting game."

(5 seconds pass)

Homer: "Aw, the waiting game sucks. Let's play Hungry Hungry Hippos!"[/QUOTe']

 

:rotflmao

 

Classic Dave:tu

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Wolfcastle: Hey Scully, that outfit makes you look like a homosexual

Crowd: Booooo!!!

Wolfcastle: Maybe you all are homosexuals, too!

Crowd: Booooo!!!

 

----------------

 

Willy: I couldn't have shot Mr. Burns. I messed up my thumbs playing Spaced Invaders in the 80s[paraphased]

Wiggum: Oh, yeah! That was a great video game.

Willy: Video game?

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Any Willie discussion kicks butt.

 

Groundskeeper Willie: It won't last. Brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Englishmen and Scots! Or Welshmen and Scots! Or Japanese and Scots! Or Scots and other Scots! Damn Scots! They ruined Scotland!

 

Principal Skinner: You Scots sure are a contentious people.

 

Groundskeeper Willie: You just made an enemy for life!

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Willie- "Agch. Boy. You read my thoughts. You've got the shinnin"

Bart- "You mean 'Shining'"

Willie- "Shh. Ya wanna get sued?"

 

Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?

Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)

 

Homer: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.

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One of my favorite Homer quotes in the last few years:

 

To Bart: "If a woman says nothing's wrong, everything's wrong. And if a woman says everything's wrong, everything's wrong. And if a woman says something isn't funny, you'd better not laugh your ass off."

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This one was just far too long to type in, but it's easily one of my favorite sequences from the entire show.

 

Witness Relocation Agent: Tell you what, sir. From now on, you'll be, uh, Homer Thompson at Terror Lake. Let's just practice a bit, hmm? When I say, "Hello, Mr. Thompson," you'll say, "Hi."

Homer: Check.

Agent: Hello, Mr. Thompson.

(Homer says nothing.)

Worker: Remember now, your name is Homer Thompson.

Homer: I gotcha.

Agent: Hello, Mr. Thompson.

(Homer stays silent.)

(The clock goes forward several hours.)

Worker: Now, when I say, "Hello, Mr. Thompson," and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.

Homer: No problem.

Agent: HELLO, MR. THOMPSON! (He stomps on Homer's foot repeatedly; Homer stares blankly for several seconds)

Homer: (to other agent) I think he's talking to you.

 

Glen

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from the episode where the Kids are taken away from the Child Services because they think homer and Marge and neglecting them. They are sent over to live the the Flanderses.

 

Homer picks up, the phone to dial Ned's house and hears the error tone, followed by:

 

"The phone number you dialed cannot be accessed from this number.......

you.

negligent.

monsters."

 

The last three words sound just like an automated voice response system where the words are put together on the fly.

 

For some reason that cracks me up.

 

 

Carlos.

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From the Episode where Homer's Horoscope said. "Today you are a going to die."

 

<Homer drives off, a tree nearly falls on the car. >

 

Homer: He-he-he. Stupid Horoscope.

 

<then a wrecking ball nearly smashes the car>

 

Homer: He-he-he. Stupid Horoscope.

 

<then a pickaxe comes flying through the windshield and the pointy end lodges in the front of homers skull>

 

Homer: He-he-he. Ploopid Ploropope.

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from the episode where the Kids are taken away from the Child Services because they think homer and Marge and neglecting them. They are sent over to live the the Flanderses.

 

Homer picks up' date=' the phone to dial Ned's house and hears the error tone, followed by:

 

"The phone number you dialed cannot be accessed from this number.......

you.

negligent.

monsters."

 

The last three words sound just like an automated voice response system where the words are put together on the fly.

 

For some reason that cracks me up.

 

 

Carlos.[/quote']

 

This one also has the great....

"wow Dad you took a baptismal for me"

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"Bart if you don't like your job you don't quit, you just go in every day and do it really half assed....that's the American way"

 

 

"hey guys I'm kindda worried about the beer supply after this case and the other case there’s only on case left"

I actually said this one at a vendor party, at a trade show, I was at last weekend upon seeing the bath tub in the hotel room filled with ice and tons of bottles of beer and liqueurs.

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