I didn't want to post until the ink is dry, but I'm excited to announce my own premium streaming service: MonkeyVision+.
What do people look for in entertainment today besides another goddamn streaming service? Remakes and reboots -- anything that comes with a built-in nostalgia factor. Our viewers want comforting, non-challenging entertainment.
With that in mind, check out some of our exciting TV shows and original movies!
A remake of Papillon starring Tracy Morgan and Melissa McCarthy.
A television series based on the hit movie Dunstan Checks In in the style of a CBS police procedural. Scarlett Johannson is voice of Dunstan the Orangutang who solves crimes over the internet. Cedric the Entertainer plays the irate hotel concierge who suspects the guest in Room 221 is an ape and wants him out. Who pops over during sweeps? Jason Alexander as Dunstan's client who suspects his wife is cheating on him! We hope to get some pop from internet outrage because ScarJo is not in fact an orang.
A remake of the Small Wonder tv show, starring Ashton Kutcher as the dad and Millie Bobbie Brown as the robot girl.
A grim and gritty movie remake of Home Improvement, starring Liam Neeson as the dad, Forrest Whittaker as Al, Peter Weller as the voice of Wilson and introducing introducing Willow Smith as a villainous studio head. Chris Hemsworth as the Tool Time Girl. Directed by Zack Snyder.
A remake of Blues Brothers 2000 (the sequel, not the original) starring Chris Kattan and Mark Wahlberg.
A remake of Backdraft starring Jonah Hill in the Kurt Russell role, Jesse Eisenberg as the imprisoned whackadoo arsonist, Olivia Munn as Adcox the villainous father figure, and Owen Wilson as voice of Fire.
We're also planning to launch Visión de mono+ in Spanish markets, of course.